Making cookies and freshly vacuumed floors

It's a cold, rainy day around here, so after Baby Girl and I picked up Little Man from school we decided to make cookies to help pass the time. The disasters that followed are worthy of a comedy routine. In fact I'm writing them down so that one day I might sell them to fund my retirement. Here goes...

Little Man cracked the egg, then, due to the slippery nature of a cracked egg, he dropped it onto the counter, where it dripped onto the drawers, cabinet doors, and floor.


Baby Girl knocked over the bowl full of dry ingredients.


Baby Girl was constantly trying to get into the flour, baking soda, honey, and anything else that would make a royal mess.


I substituted honey for maple syrup. The honey taste is overpowering, and the affect is that the cookies taste like a spoonful of honey.


Evidently I sat my bag of chocolate chips too close to the hot stove the last time I used them. Most of the chocolate chips had melted together into one big chocolate mass.


Baby Girl kept reaching for chocolate chips while I was chopping up the big chocolate mass with a huge, sharp knife.


And lastly, as I was putting the cookies into the oven, I tipped the baking sheet a little too much, and all the cookies on that pan slid onto the bottom of the oven, where they immediately melted in a big buttery, chocolately mess. Fantastic.

I said a few choice curse words in front of the kids, including probably the worst curse word you can say in front of a child. Luckily I caught myself just in time and changed the word. Close call.

I slammed the oven door a few times out of frustration.

And then, after all this occurred, I yelled at the kids, as they kept getting too close to the oven while I was doing my best to wipe melted chocolate out of a hot oven. Yelled.

A bright note, after it was all said and done I looked at the kids and sadly said, "I'm so sorry I yelled, I feel like such a bad mommy." And I really, really did feel that way. My sweet Little Man looked at me compassionately and said, "No you're not, Mommy, you're a good mommy." And he came up to me and gave me a hug.

What would I do without those sweet little beings?

Shrinking by the week

So the week before Christmas I joined a boot camp. It's an exercise program taught by an honest to goodness retired drill sergeant. It's also a little different from most boot camps, as it's not a month-long class taught by an exercise enthusiast, but instead it's a year-round, outdoor experience taught by a drill sergeant (who happens to also be an exercise enthusiast!). We are even affectionately called maggots on occasion. :)

I am loving it.

There's just something about getting up at 5:10 to go workout in a parking lot, in the cold, and be done before the sun rises. Camaraderie abounds.

If I tried to do these workouts by myself at home, or even in a gym, I would quit halfway through. They're hard. However, when doing it with 30 or so other people, who are grimacing and grunting their way through it just as you are, it becomes easier. And the hour flies by.

It's also so very nice that I get home and at the very least I am wide awake and out of bed before the kids wake up. My kids are demanding when they wake up. Milk - now, breakfast - now, cartoons - now. No time to change the pull-up, warm them up with socks and a sweat shirt, or even for Mommy to go potty or make coffee. Now, now, now! Sometimes after boot camp I'm even able to take a shower, get dressed, and make a pot of coffee before the little monsters, er... sweethearts, wake up. Heaven.

And the icing on the cake, oops I mean healthy, all natural, low fat snack, is that I've lost about four pounds. Now I know some people might not dance a jig over four little pounds, but that comes out to a healthy average of losing one pound a week, lost over the holidays, from someone who is only about 15 pounds overweight. Seems pretty good to me! Let's also not forget the fact that I've gained a lot of muscle. Heavy muscle. My legs and arms already look more muscular. No jiggle - anywhere. Even at rest. My behind and belly are not quite there, but they're closer. There is definition in my abs. Yes, my "15 pounds overweight I've had two children abs" have some definition.

And it's only week four!!

Whoo hoo! God willing and the creek don't rise I see a bikini in my summer future! :)

Busy

It is 1:17 pm. So far today I have completed an intense, one-hour workout, thoroughly dusted the entire downstairs, finished the laundry, baked two loaves of from scratch bread (no bread maker here!), made homemade, from scratch soft pretzels for a healthy snack, cleaned the kitchen (no small task after all the baking), fed two kids lunch, put them in their beds for a nap, picked up so I can vacuum, soothed a sickly baby girl, and purchased a new dresser.

This mama is plum wore out!

The OCD Wagon

This self-professed OCD clean/neat freak has fallen off the wagon.

My house is a disaster. All the time.

Why clean when the little munchkins destroy it faster than I can work?

Seriously, I take time to clean the kitchen, and in the meantime they've pulled every toy out of the toy closet. So I put the toy closet back together and they've gone upstairs and dumped all the cars, dinosaurs, etc. out onto the floor. I can have them help me clean up, and I do, but that takes
f o r e v e r .

I'll go on and say that it's not lack of time that keeps me from cleaning, it totally isn't. If I stayed off facebook, and stopped reading blogs, and turned off the tv I could get a lot done. Maybe. Some days I DO turn off the computer and tv and still not much gets done.

Thankfully The Husband doesn't mind, or really notice, for that matter. He could live in a hovel, and as long as he had ramen noodles in the pantry and clean boxers he could go on unaffected.

I've just lost my motivation. Really. Why bust my behind when by bedtime it's a disaster all over again. Toys everywhere, yogurt/applesauce/take your pick smeared all over the kitchen counters/chairs/floor/cabinets/table/take your pick.

We've discussed hiring some help, but that seems silly. I am a stay-at-home-mom, after all. Plus it's not that the house is impossible to clean, it just doesn't stay clean. It literally makes me think, "Ahh, bleecch," when it's time to clean.

Well, Little Man starts going to school five days a week next year (sob!!), maybe my house will be clean then.

Or not.

Balance

It's so hard to find balance.

It seems that we have kid-centric days where we have a lot of fun, but nothing else gets done, or I plop the kids down in front of the tv all day and I get to knock off my to-do list.

Of course, I know that my kids are always most important. More important than a clean house, or a delicious meal, or whatever else...but still.

Hmmm, will to work on that.

To 2010

2010, you were good to us in so many ways. Time together as a family, Little Man officially starting school, Baby Girl turning into a rambunctious toddler, vacation, The Husband and I growing together as a couple.


However, I probably won't remember you for those things, nice as they are. I think I will always remember you for all the health issues, among other things.


And DRAMA. Not people created drama, but the kind of drama that life hands you on a platter and says - "DEAL."


Just to recap: my brother-in-law was in Port-au-Prince during the Haiti earthquake. He was supposed to be staying at the Hotel Montana , but at the last minute was diverted to another hotel which didn't sustain much damage. He lost two coworkers who did stay at the Hotel Montana. It about gave all of us over here heart attacks. Seriously. However, he ended up making it home within a week, and without a scratch on his body. With all of his luggage, to boot. Which seems to be the theme of this year, near tragedy.


After the earthquake, The Husband flew to Miami to wait for his brother to make it to the States. While he was gone, my step mom, who has been my step mom since I was a preschooler, went into the ER. Turns out she had a stroke. She's in her 50s. She spent a few days in the hospital and recovered about 99%, which is terrific. It was just scary, and kind of still is.


A day or two from the time my step mom was released from the hospital, my grandmother, who lives three hours away, was taken to the ER and then placed in intensive care. She remained in the hospital for over a month. We were told on two occasions that she wouldn't make it, and on one occasion we were told to hurry and drive up there as fast as we could if we wanted a chance to say goodbye. Terrible. My mom and I drove the three hours to see her every weekend, and I went alone a few times during the week. This was the reason for my first night away from Baby Girl. I slept in a hospital chair one night. There were trips afterward to help clean grandmom's house and stock her freezer with food. She's doing so much better now, she's still on dialysis, but is hanging in there. Again, and near tragedy.


Then about the time my grandmother was back at home, we found out that my mom had cancer. I wrote about it here. The uncertainty, the surgery, the LONG recovery. She had her six month scan a few weeks ago, everything looks good. She'll have regular scans for the rest of her life, but that's ok. Yet again, a very stressful event with the potential to become a tragedy, but it didn't. I know personally it gave me a few gray hairs.


We had a few months of quiet, during which The Husband's family cam to visit, and we all went to the beach together for vacation. It was a good time, a fun time.


Right after our beach vacation, I realized that I wasn't feeling so well. I was nauseous all the time and severely bloated. After a few weeks of this I went to the doctor and found out that my gallbladder wasn't working and it would have to come out. Not only that, but due to the radioactive nature of one of the diagnostic tests, the anaesthesia from surgery, and then having to take pain meds, I would have to stop nursing Baby Girl. That was a tragedy in and of itself. The surgery went well, the recovery was not fun, but thankfully I'm feeling much better.


Two days after my surgery The Husband had to take Little Man to an ENT appointment, and it turned out that he needed his tonsils out. So...we scheduled another surgery. I still wasn't fully recovered from mine when we were back in the same surgery center. Little Man's surgery went well, and he's sleeping so much better now. His whole mood and behavior have improved, evidently he was very sleep deprived from his enlarged tonsils.


Now my 89 year-old grandfather is in the hospital with pneumonia. They are expecting him to recover, but it's still hard on him. I hope he makes it home soon. Baby Girl has been sick with a cold (which has pretty much been her constant state since I quit nursing, go breast milk!) and she gave it to me (also pretty much consistent with the past few months), so I haven't been able to see him this week.

I don't write this as a "poor me" post, or to lament all that we've been through. When I think about it all together or see it in writing, it truly astonishes me that we've experienced all this in one year. Earthquake, mother having a stroke, grandmother nearly dying, mother with cancer and surgery, surgery for me, surgery for Little Man...it's a lot. We're still grateful, we're still happy, we're taking a big sigh of relief to put this year behind us! Really, we pulled through adversity and we're better than ever. We learned what is and what isn't important. We've grown closer and stronger. Growth may be painful but it sometimes is necessary.

So a year of, thankfully, near tragedies for us. I am well aware that it could have been a whole lot worse. Had any one of these incidences taken a different turn and 2010 would have been a very different year indeed. I am so very thankful that they didn't, and thankful for the good times we had. I'm hoping that 2011 is calmer, quieter, and HEALTHIER!!

Magic and breathing easier

It's December 28th and I just put away the Christmas tree and most of the decorations. I'm not usually so eager to have Christmas put back in the attic, but that tree was taking up precious storage space for toys. While I'm somewhat sad to see it gone, I can actually physically breathe easier now that we have a lot less visual clutter.

Ahh...

I did leave a few things up - the construction paper garland the kids and I made, the half-eaten gingerbread house, a couple of smelly good Christmas candles, and a few twinkly lights. We'll let the kids enjoy the Christmas magic a few days longer.

And on another note, Christmas magic...It's amazing how the littlest things are magical to the kids. Even after weeks of having them around, the twinkly lights and garland bring a big excited smile to the kids' faces. They keep begging to eat the gingerbread house, and I let them pick pieces off throughout the day. It doesn't taste good at all, but Little Man and Baby Girl haven't seemed to notice. Snow globes, I don't even know what to say about those! Grandma Monger gave each of the kids their very own snow globe last year, and this year as well. She wants to start a collection for them. The little ones go crazy for it. Shaking them up, watching the snow fall, listening to the tinkling music. Thank you, Monger.

And yet on another note, Monger left yesterday to spend a few weeks in Spain with the other branch of the family. Can I say that I'm a little jealous? She'll spend several days in Spain, then they're all off to the Canary Islands for a week-long vacation, then it's a few days more in Spain before coming home. Yes, I'm just a little jealous. Not only of the adventure, but of getting to see the family. I would love so much to be able to see my husband's side of the family more than once a year, and for my kids to grow up with cousins as best friends. Maybe one day....I'm not sure what we're going to do for this long without Monger. Little Man sincerely thinks she's going to be gone for two days, not two weeks. He's already asking if he can go over to her house to spend the night, and I'm looking at two weeks without help during the week. It can be done, I know, but Monger helps us out so much! Again, thank you, Monger. It's true what they say, "Absence makes the heart grow fonder."

And that is all I have to say, I'm off to vacuum and settle into a good book!